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(Sam)(ael ooa Assignments)


 * Sam)(ael**


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 * Assignment A: Write at least 4 paragraphs explaining how you feel you can allow Fear to make you a better person? Why do you think Fear is often mistaken for a bad thing? How does fear effect you right now? How can you change Fear from being a bad thing to being a good thing in your life right now? ||

I am naturally a worrier. Its in my nature to fear all the time. To make absolutely sure things reach the mark. Not quite the same as fear but a version that is very close in it's own way. On the other hand I also am very good at disregarding my fears. I am not particularly afraid to die or to be hurt so I can let go of caution when I must and I freeze up more during surprise than fear by far.

I have learned to channel that fear into my work. I feed the parts that help motivate me to act and to work harder and to watch more carefully. Because I will naturally think about an important project at least daily until it is complete and can be set asside I can take that worrying time and make sure everything has been accounted for, the possabilities have been weighed and prepared for, and I am ready for the next step.

I think fear is mistaken for a bad thing because of it's negative nature. Unlike the negative nature in love that easily leads to obsessions and jealousy, fear looks weak when it is displayed. It plays against cultural taboos of a powerful appearance. When fear happens it looks bad. When fear happens people abandon each other. When fear happens people loose their cool and that just doesn't look good. Plus like any emotion... Emotions that we sense in others spread to us. People abandon the sinking ship.

Right now I am stressed a bit. The paperwork I sent in for my mission is very important. I have faith that it will work out and that always banishes the fears (they cannot exist in the same vessel at once) but it is also in my nature to fear a bit. To plan on everything going wrong. I have to remind myself sometimes that God is in charge and that I am doing this for His glory and under His command.


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 * Assignment B: Write at least 2 paragraphs explaining how your choices effect your life and how much they effect your emotions. ||

Well I can give you an experience from just last night. I was feeling Really, really tempted. I wanted to go do something I knew was wrong pretty bad and I knew it was wrong and I wanted to do what was right pretty bad also, so I was sitting there with two sides of myself battling each other. My physical nature and my inherant human desire for quick fun (AKA 'thrill') versus my will and desire to serve God and remain within the bounds he set and my desire to be a good person myself.

The Feelings were clashing and confused because almost like two people I was pulling on both sides of my rope. I Prayed for help finding the will to do what was right and then I pushed away all of the temptations. I just told them they didn't exist and with my mind I ignored them. And (I know that this might be a bit advanced because I have had mental training that allows me to 'not exist' things) it was gone.

I chose what was right and peace was the result. Choice can control or excite emotions, but right choice always causes peace even if other emotions are present. There will always be peace.